With a shuddering lip, she has to make the choice,
but no matter how she searches, she cannot find her voice
to whisper even the smallest of phrases to his questioning look,
leaving him to forget this love that she forsook.
In a struggle of what is right and wrong,
she leaves out all of that for which she longs.
And because the choking sensation will not let her be,
she has to force him out and set him free.
No matter what she longs to feel inside,
she cannot be at peace with what she hides.
A history that burns the frailty of her mind,
a past with sharp, jagged edges that grind
her into mush and then spit her out,
mixed with all her misery and doubt.
She is sure that he will never understand,
and, furthermore, of him, that she cannot demand.
You see, because the place she lives isn’t one for him;
a shadowed place of fear and desolation.
No light can exist in the darkness that she owns,
and, for that, she must always be alone.